Unsigned letters

These are fun! I got the idea from Hobbit.

1) One thing is for sure, the people we were when we met half my life ago aren't the same people we are today. We knew each other for years before we were close. For a time, it seemed you would become a real part of our family. Then that relationship died. You were left a shell of the man that had to many of us seemed unbreakable.

But in the midst of your pain, we started a friendship that has turned you as much into my brother as you ever could be.

You've pushed me to be a better man. You've pushed me to embrace who I am and show it to the world. Without you, I may never have discovered the true sport of all men: karaoke.

Because of you, I recognize I have feelings. That sounds ludicrous when I say it, but I was on the path to becoming a robot consumed with the need for emotional distance. I recognize feelings are neither right or wrong. It is up to us to recognize how we feel and communicate our feelings.

Because of you I value honesty and the ability to express myself. Stop placating people. Just be honest with them and allow them to be honest.

I celebrate that when I shy away from a confrontation, when I hesitate to admit reality, you are an influence I can't ignore. You have taught me honesty and generosity.

Even when you drive me nuts with your need to over analyze and deliberate over several months, I realize I drive you nuts with the same problem. Our ability to agree to disagree, to state our opinions and let the other person decide without the need to manipulate or intimidate each other has motivated me to seek this honesty in all my interactions. You can have a strong personality and be direct without being rude.

You're my brother in every way but blood.

2) All you ever wanted was for us to love you. For years, you couldn't understand why we didn't like you. We couldn't follow a man that wouldn't accept anyone else's opinion. We couldn't be around a man that seemed so fixated on the goodness of his character he could not listen to someone point out what they considered a fault without him turning defensive.

You spoke as though stupefied that one thing could go wrong and it would eradicate all the good things you had done, all the while alienating those who wanted to be close to you as much as you wanted to be close to them. Why were we pointing out your errors? How could those things outshine your generosity? Why weren't we celebrating all the good things you had done? How could you be so vastly misunderstood?

Now, I'm sad to see a person that means so much to you going through similar problems.

But for you? I am proud to be close to you. We've both had to grow up a lot. We've wronged each others in ways that have changed our relationship forever. But today we are close. Today I look forward to seeing you. I look forward to those cushy lunches we have, those deep conversations that you insisted you were not capable of. In many ways, you have grown from the kind of man I wanted nothing to do with into the kind of man I want to be.