Superman doesn't fly as high as hype

Think back to that day you viewed Superman: the Movie; that day when Christopher Reeve donned those famous red, yellow, and blue tights and made us believe a man could fly.

For years, I wished I could soar through the sky. I dreamed I could break free of gravity to twist and turn with the freedom of Superman.

Finally, that day has come for us all.

And to tell you the truth, it's not nearly as fun as it looks.

Six Flags over Georgia opened one of their latest attractions with the delight of an architect unveiling his new city. Superman: Ultimate Flight awaited us in a faux Metropolis, seen in the distance on the right.

At the entrance, we passed a delightful shop of toys and plush dolls dedicated to the most popular superheroes of today: Superman, Spiderman, Kung Fu Panda, and Captain Jack Sparrow (wtf?).

But I said to hell with the toys, those can wait 'till later, I'm ready to fly!

Thanks to Hobbit's clever idea to arrive at opening, there were NO lines. We went straight up the long walkway, past several pinups of Superman's friends, foes, and allies, and to the ride. Never has my inner geek felt more excited than when the seats pulled my feet off the ground and held me vertical. I laughed at those cautious fools around me, holding on tight to their seats. No, I let go and held my hands out, already imagining what it would be like to take flight.

But after the first drop, the ride held too many twists and turns and was over far too quickly. Most coasters at Six Flags average 1 minute. This one barely clocks half a minute. Granted, we flew in the middle of the rows, so perhaps this, like many coasters, can only offer the full benefit if you sit in the front row. There weren't enough high rises and steep falls for me to feel like I was flying. Instead, I felt jostled about, as though if I was flying well, I had no control over it.

Afterwards, we went on a couple more coasters we had decided MUST come first while the lines were short. Our first long line came without warning. One coaster had no line, the next, at the Goliath, made us wait almost 2 hours. But I assure you, it was worth it. The first drop is the highest in the park, so high you can see the entire landscape before screaming as you fall down a slope so steep it looks sheer.

Next we went to Batman! As you can see, to get to this ride the owners of Six Flags think it is necessary to torture you. They pack as many people as possible into a room that APPEARS to lead to the ride, but really circles back around to the other side of the building, then into a hidden building, before finally letting you see your prize.

The Goliath and the Batman ride take the crown as kings of the park. The ride is designed to propel you at rocket speeds through the coaster course as though you are on a high-speed chase in the Batmobile.

I was just yelling to Hobbit how great it would be to have a Batmobile of our own when, what-ho!, I saw a Batmobile just waiting for us, its owners, heh, distracted by what no man can resist, an Asian woman!

Or so I thought. They did not take too kindly to me stealing their beloved Batmobile.

Luckily, my lady-friend brought her Bat-Befriender. We sprayed some on and became instant friends, inducted as honorary crime-fighters.

The day went on with us riding several more coasters, including Hobbit's favorites: anything that gets you soaking wet.

In all, we spent 11 hours at the park.

If you are planning your own trip, please take these few hints with you.

1) DO NOT park on Six Flags or at the parking lots directly by the park. They charge you between $15 and $20. Even local venues 1 block away are wise to tourists and charge you at least $10. We parked 2 blocks away at a hotel where we were charged a paltry $5.

2) Arrive early.

3) Prioritize what rides you want to go on without a wait. If you reach these rides between 10:00 and 11:00 AM, you will have next to no wait.

4) Decide right now if you want a Flash Pass, an add-on to your ticket thanks to the scarlet speedster that allows you to bypass the long line and often go straight to the front. It's about $40 more, but unless you want to wait 2 hours for a ride, you should consider it a wise investment.

5) Stay all day. For the first and last 2 hours the park was open, lines were very short, so you do yourself a service to be there from open to close.

Otherwise, we spent Friday traveling around Athens to find an apartment. I am happy to say we found one. Housing in Athens is ridiculously cheap! I am in negotiations to solidify where I will work, but with housing set it is almost certain I will move early June.